[[ jesus]]

Liberating Power of Grace

2006-04-19T20:31:00.000-07:00

As the Lord continues to teach me and allow me to grasp little bits and pieces of his grace, this is a new one...

"The Liberating Power of Grace"

This has been blowing me away in the last few days. The reason i am excited about that is because i've been hearing the word grace my entire life and it has never taken on any meaning other than it's available for me when i sin. A very immature understanding of his grace. And even then i don't understand that much of his grace. It's like my whole life grace has gone in one ear and out the other...but something different has happened in my heart lately. It's by his grace only, that i can experience and learn about his grace. You know? It's like we are soo feeble and small and yet he allows us to get in on everything. Breathing being the first thing.

So with all this said, looking at his grace from the other angle appears different aspects of his grace. This particular aspect brings about Liberation. Freedom. Power. Authority.

The power of his grace knocked the most ruthless persecutor of christians, Saul=Paul, to his knees and in being blinded by this powerful emergence of God's grace, he was given life, not because he did anything to earn it. If anything, he deserved to be struck down dead just like the people who tried to carry the ark of the covenant. Or like Ananias and Sapphira in Acts ch. 4. They were struck completley dead.

That's what he really deserved. Instead he got life. He didnt walk away from that moment the same. He got a new name. Received life...eternal life that started when he got up from the dirt. He walked impacted and changed because of this liberating and powerful grace. Then the freeing power of grace poured itself right through Paul and into soo many different bodies of people. The freeing power of grace is still at work today in His church, as Church is changing and morphing into what Paul layed out as the New Testament church. How amazing is that. Grace knows no limits and sees all people through the same lens.

So i read all throughout his letters and his words of grace. The same for Peter. And yet, i have to ask myself do we truly walk and live as if we have been changed and impacted by that liberating grace that knows us as we are.

But, in just a few moments on a cross, jesus. That's all i have to say. Our minds can chase all the truths that come from that one thought of liberating grace. Jesus on the cross.

The heart of God and Jesus was to free the captives.

"It is for freedom that christ has set us free!" Liberation to an undeserving people. Power rests on us because thats what Grace does when we embrace it fully, even if we dont know what it means to embrace his grace fully.

If we choose Him, we are free. Nothing can change that. I pray that the power of his grace on our lives individually and collectively would mature itself in us even more, just as it is doing.

Praise God for the glorious grace!

Liberated,
::johnchristian

...Grace and Truth

2006-04-09T00:39:00.000-07:00

It is really late right now and i am still up with these two cornerstone facets of God on my mind.

I can't sleep.

Recently i have been experiencing Truth like never before. It was like a divine revelation from Heaven hit me over the head with the lightbulb and weight of his truth.

The truth of God will always lead me to freedom and the lies of the devil will always lead me to bondage.

That truth has been made clear to me recently.

Soo.....with that said...Grace has come into the picture all the more beautifully. I am going to just admit that i don't understand, receive, and walk in the glory of his grace as much as i would like to think i am. I dont expect any of this to actually make sense because it is 2.43 am, but i am just unloading. I have to put it somewhere and i just feel like typing at the moment.

With truth and grace on the brain...i have been extremely humbled through a few situations...I have caught myself being a little self righteous and actually thinking that i am above the struggles and temptations of this world. No. Not true. I am not Jesus. I am not perfect. I live in a fallen world with a body that is decaying all the time until it gets back to the dust, from which it came. But, at the same time, i am a new creation. Made alive, meaning i was once dead. Anyways...point being, i am not above anything or anyone...I am only fooling myself to actually think that i am better, or above that person who is acting like a fool in public, or drunk, or etc. In fact, ill go so far as to say that I AM THAT PERSON. Thats me. I am in need of jesus and in need of recieving his grace and truth ALL THE TIME. Literally. ALL THE TIME. This week has been sobering to me.

I have realized that i can muster up all the passion and all the want to and all the going to for jesus....but, if my choices (choose you this day whom you will serve) arent truth and i buy into a lie and choose some crap over the satisfyer of life....then i am left no different than any unbelieving person, in fact i am worse. I am then a hypocrite. All this stuff sounds so extreme...but really, is it that extreme. I think not. Him in me is greater than the world. But if i dont choose to actually belive that then i am nothing. This is where i am right now. Seeing and experiencing the importance of his truth on my life...and also tasting my depravity at the same time.

Anyways...its probably time to go to bed.

Will the struggle ever end. yes. it will. but i have to belive in the only one worthy of believing in. his name is jesus. I praise his name because i get caught in his grace more times than i realize. In fact, i am caught in his grace all the time.

::johnchristian

::Taste and See

2006-03-19T21:11:00.000-08:00

Life has been very very joyful and very rich for me lately. God is pouring into me like never before. Just as there are dry seasons, there are seasons where he is rich. Im sure at another point in life i will say the same thing, "like never before, God is pouring into me." But really, He is...I know i keep saying this semester is very different for me but it is. Extremely different. I am by myself alot of the time. That has its positives and negatives too though. It has been amazing. He has been developing a new hunger and thirst for Him every day.

I have been blessed in receiving various opportunities to speak or teach in this season. I have to admit, this is a good thing. This is a passion that i am just discovering in the past few months. I dont have a clue if im any good. Not really worried about that. I am learning soo much through just being available and obedient in this process. I am seeing so many things that the Lord has taught me in the past few years while being emersed in an amazing environment back in auburn. Im seeing alot of things that the Lord taught me last semester...things that were hard to get through. Im seeing the evidence of him in situations now.

If im completley honest and transparent right now (because thats what we all want see) I have been very humbled when i get the opportunity because of and only because of his grace in my life. His grace has strengthened me so many times when i choose something like crap over him. It really does matter how we live and the decisions we make. Everyone. Pastors, preachers, speakers, worship leaders, lost, saved, clued in, cluelessed, your great grand mother, your mom and dad, your boyfriend, girlfriend, etc. you get the point. A daily "taste and see" of jesus has become my life and hearts cry.
He is good isnt He?

Because once youve tasted of the living God you cant keep that in....You cant hide that..... You cant lock that up..... It has to go..... It has to come forth..... It has to be loosed..... It has to be spread. That joy that is soo deep down in us...his spirit and our spirit fellowshipping together creates an overflowing affect on our lives. Its by his grace that i can taste and see the one who is life.

The title of this particular blog: "Taste and See," has become a constant on my mind in this season. Psalm 34:8 says, ..."tast and see that the Lord is good." I mean can't you just see Jesus looking into your eyes intently, asking, with his hands out, "dont you want me? come and taste how good i am. i will satisfy you in the places you are dying to be satisfied. come and drink of me, drink deeply of me." I mean, he has always been offering himself to his people with that intention and with that passion. And in the process of tasting and knowing that he's good, things of this world fade and abiding/obedience start to become an easy choice when that satisfaction begins to be rivaled by something apart from Jesus. That has become reality to me. Unless its reality, we dont get it. Unless you know how bad some things in life taste you will never say no to them.

I've had the privilage of being around alot of high school kids this past week. I was around 3 different collections of kids this week and i must say that i forgot what it is like to be in high school. It was incredibly obvious to me who is tasting and knowing jesus and who isn't, and maybe who never have. We live in a culture where christianity is the thing to do and everyone knows how to put that front on. Thats not new news to you or me. I must admit that i tend to forget that people...all of us need him. Saved or not saved. We all are in need of tasting and knowing that hes good.

Sorry for the length. If you've read this please feel free to tell of how you have tasted the Lord recently. I would love to hear.

::johnchristian

All of Creation Groans....

2006-02-18T17:51:00.000-08:00

It is true that all creation groans and eagerly awaits the revealing of the sons of God.

This semester has been really refreshing being in Montgomery. It is funny to me that i am here. In this city. Because i swore that i would never come back here...while being very immature at the time, its about right that the Lord has brought me back to the places in which i grew up. Its about right that i have a yearning and eager expectation to see God do something revolutionary in this town that is traditional and lack the reality of christ as life. Some might question my comment just then. Thats just the brutal truth.

So the question ive been asking myself is, "what can a 21 year old college student do amongst such a large continengent of Church going people?" The answer that ive been sensing is absolutely nothing. Haha...however, Jesus can do anything he so desires in and through me to the glory. And in anyone else willing and available. As i sit here at my computer, with soo many thoughts passing through my mind and stirring in my heart...i cant grasp them all. But the one thing i am grasping is that really...all of creation is groaning and is in eager anticipation to see the sons of God revealed. I love it.

It doesn't matter where i am, at any point in the day, he is constantly showing the reality of that truth. Whether its in basketball practice with high school kids....in a large first baptist church....or even in my place of rest. The best is the other day i was looking in the mirror and it hit me. I am eager to see the sons of God revealed.

To take this story a little further...i was sitting at starbucks just yesterday late afternoon.....I moved my stuff outside because it was just too perfect to pass up.

Sitting there with my ipod nano (shout out to man db) but with only one headphone going, out of the other ear, i couldnt help but listen to a conversation going on just a few feet behind me.

The conversation consisted of 6 wealthy-looking business men. It truly was a sight. I mean these guys were dappered out. They certaintly weren't struggling nor would they be anytime soon. I don't quite know exactly what they were doing there, but i do know that it served a greater purpose. One man was throwing out figures that i will never see in my life-time. Actually my whole family has never seen all together. But he was saying that with all that money..."there has to be a greater purpose than to be just wealthy." Yeah, that got my attention. I started listening more...

This man to his right sat up out of his chair and started saying that the greater purpose is God and how that plays into there having lots of money. Now i dont know where they stand but i know that something is stirring in them. Something great.

Now, i must say there isnt an exciting end to this story. I didnt get up to go counsel these much older, much more sophisticated businessmen. I just smiled at them and waved. Praying that God continue to stir in them. They were hearing right on that day.

That 10 minute conversation amongst total strangers(that i didnt take part in) has done alot in me to see that all creation really is groaning and desiring to see Jesus come alive in the people of God. Exciting!

::johnchristian

[[ The Giver of Newness ]]

2006-01-23T19:55:00.000-08:00

Jesus has always been the giver of newness.

Its january and a new semester has already begun. Each semester looks different than the one before. Praise God for that. I named this blog "The Giver of Newness" because i am in a completely different place. Really. A different city doing something different. While, on the surface, living life for me may look alot different, granted i am not in school this semester-but rather in between schools. I am not living in Auburn. I am living in Montgomery. I am working at a Church and not Gap. I live at home with mom, dad, and sister as opposed to Riley, Walker, Rus, and James Robert. So those are the details that have changed on the surface.

All of that is new. Considering the fact that i havent left Auburn in 16 months (excluding trips). But it is Good. Real Good. I am seeing the things that the Lord has engraved in to my life since ive been in Auburn. That is always exciting. To visibly see what the Lord has done. Because He has done soo much to see.

But Jesus has become more to me in this place of newness. I feel his pleasure just being here and saying yes to him asking me to go. Now He didnt ask me to go across the world or to china or africa...just 40 minutes down the road. But each day i am seeing more and more my purpose and reason to me being here. That stirs passion and life in me. To know that the God of the universe and i had a conversation about his people in a specific region in a small state on a small planet, that he created to point us to Glory...then make all the doors come open for me to land slap dab in the middle of those people we talked about. That might sound really confusing, but work with me here...im bloggin.

I am also coaching basketball with my dad. He is a varsity boys basketball coach at my high school...None of this seems interesting for a college kid to come back to. "Why would you ever want to go back there?" Someone asked. Its crazy, because i never thought i would want to go back either. I hate Montgomery for the most part. But, as ive learned, when you surrender all to the Lord, he puts things in your heart you never thought you would feel. Thats where i am right now in life. Im doing alot of stuff that is only jesus. I never thought i would not be going to college at auburn but rather taking Bible College classes online from Atlanta. Yeah, i start that in May. The great thing is...I wouldnt have it any other way.

I love this freshness the Lord has allowed me to partake in. Even the things im studying and learning about in the word are fresh and new. Ive been digging and taking apart Ephesians and ive got to say that Jesus is supreme. He is the one whom my hope is found in. He is always the one to whom glory is pointed to. I could go on and on. Ultimately he has breathed fresh life into us. Thats what happend when we became fully alive in Christ. He made us new. He breathed into us a new breath. Amazing.

I have been clinging to this statement of truth in this new season(if you call me and dont get me, you will hear this on my voicemail..as some people have gotten a kick out of it, so i hear)

"who we need most and what we need most is the same thing...its jesus."
-matt dean

But really, it is. Because he is ultimate and supreme. Nothing else satisfies, nothing else grants me what i need. Nothing else proposes joy in surrendering like jesus does.

If you've read this...
please pray for me. that i would proclaim with boldness the gospel. that revival would break out in Montgomery. and last for my family. thank you and may He give you a taste of fresh water today.

::johnchristian

...To Know Him

2005-12-26T12:33:00.000-08:00

To Know Him...

It's the very cry of the deepest part of who we are and who we were fashioned in his image to be.

Over the course of the last few weeks and really few days, that truth has been made known to me and it has gotten my attention. To know him, jesus, is what you and i were ultimately meant to do. That, true life, which is eternal life, is found in knowing Him. God has never mislead his people...EVER! He tells us in the book of john, ch. 17 verse 3...

"now this is eternal life, that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent."

At the end of the day, in this culture of hustle and bustle--in this life of doing all the time, the only question i am compelled to ask myself is: "Did i know Him today?" Ultimately that is the only thing that matters. Everything i do is an overflow from knowing Him. Easier said than done. But really he broke that down for even a child to understand, so really, i dont think the life long goal for his children is really that complex.

I say all this because I have felt the pressure and expectation to have it all together for the rest of my life. To know what im doing for the rest of my life...find a way to provide for the rest of my life and the people he blesses me with in the process. All of it is really not what he's about...at all! He is about engaging with me. All of those things are great, and part of the deal...but i dont want to miss THE DEAL. Jesus...knowing him....THAT DEAL. Are u feeling me yet?

My heart has been heavy for the past few days because of all this expectation to have it together. Haha. He wants my heart and your heart today and now. He cant wait. Something that i was learning about a few days ago makes sense to me now...

[[ Exodus ch. 3 ]]

V.7 The Lord said, "I have indeed seen the misery of my people in Egypt, I have heard them crying out because of their slave drivers, and I AM concerned about their suffering."

:: words cannot express the emotion and passion that stirred in me just now as i read through that again. Wow!

God pulled moses into a burning bush on top of a mountain to tell him this. Moses's name means "called out." That alone makes sense, that he called him out to reveal the matchless character of God. Many people on this tiny planet and in this tiny earth only see God and know God as wrathful....but here is the compassionate heart of God. If you look back and see the specific words he uses, it will make sense.

"...seen"--so God is paying close attention to his people
"...heard"--so God is listening; he is not mute
"...concerned"--so God cares and has compassion for the broken hearted.

Hello! God is more concerned about knowing us, his chosen people. The ones that live life surrendered and faithful, knowing that they dont have it together--and never will. The ones that receive his grace and give HIM, the only worthy one, the Glory that is due him.

For the past few days and maybe even weeks ive not let that sink in. But i wasnt supposed to. It looks great to me right now. I feel alot better about where he has me in this process of transformation.

God called out Moses to live a life worthy of his very name. "called out". And thats what he has done for me and u. He has called us out to live a life to know him. Praise Him for that. Praise only Him for that.

knowing him...
::johnchristian

[[ Seek Me And Live ]]

2005-12-05T19:14:00.000-08:00

Those four words that acts as the title of this blog are four words that have become a daily prayer of my heart.

Amos 5:4 says: "Seek Me and live."

Amazing. Who knew. Amos. I have to admit that i haven't been reading out of Amos lately. I don't know that i have ever read out of Amos come to think of it.

But, i must say, i love how the Lord teaches me. I had a not so great thanksgiving break. I was having to stay in Auburn for all but two days of the break to work. Not complaining. Totally blessed to be able to make some money and learn discipline and committment and all those great words that comes with the territory of a job.

My 4 roommates left and i was by myself in my apartment in Auburn for a long time. I could go on with more details to set up the real storyline here but ill choose to just tell you that my heart was very lonely, very disengaged, and i was searching...without even realizing that i was searching for...Life...Jesus.

So, end of the week comes and i finally was engaged with the father and he spoke words of correction, words of truth, words of encouragement to my heart. But, he led me to this verse. Amos 5:4.

As i was reading it, i was just soo excited and passionate about those words. "SEEK ME AND LIVE."

If you know me pretty well, you will not be suprised at what i did next.

I began to disect these four words. Belive or not, i stayed on this one verse and a few words around it for the entire week. Amazing.

I love how he tells us to Seek Him. Notice he doesnt say seek anything else but "him." He says this out of his knowing that we are prone to search elsewhere and even anywhere but him for life. It's like ive gone searching in every place but jesus for life. Could be a girl, a feeling, a job, money, food, sports, whatever you want to fill in the blank. But it gets better than that. The context of this verse is the Lord talking to the House of Israel. A great picture of a group of people who denied the Lord's goodness for many years and are constantly denying him. Just like we do everyday. After he says "Seek me and live," read what he says next:

v.5 "do not seek Bethel, Do not go to Gilgal, do not journey to Beersheba, for Gilgal will surely be reduced to nothing."

He commands this because he knows our tendancies.He knows us so well because He is our maker. He knows that we are proned to wonder, and leave the God we love. Recognize that?

Ill be honest and say i wish i knew more of the background behind those places he names that "will be reduced to nothing." But i don't. I do know that they represent many areas and places in my life that i constantly run to and deny God's goodness. Places that don't produce life, but lead to death. Needless to say, the Lord did alot in me over that week through 4 words. Four!!

Here is an exert from my journal in response to all of this:

"This is soo great. To seek and come after You. Bc honestly, Im more desperate for You than i have any idea. More desperate for you than my mind or emotions allow myself to recognize. In the days where Im floating and flirting with complacency, my mind and feelings dont want to seek. But you've equipped me with everything i need to seek you in order to find life and be found by you. You have truly equipped me with every spiritual gift until the day you return. Fashion this truth in me."

Know that i didnt reveal the degree of struggle i experienced during that week. So all of this carries alot more weight than i may have portrayed. But i pray that he can use Amos 5:4 to do something in you too.

Praise God for the four word Bible study.

::johnchristian

infinite God.

2005-11-16T08:59:00.000-08:00

Infinite God.

You are infinitely better...
You are infinitely supreme...
You are infinitely wise...
You are the creator of infinite...
You are ever expanding God

If you can't tell, God has been revealing his infiniteness of who he is. It's funny, because in all honesty, i can't really understand or comprehend that. But his truth has been made real to me this morning. I have soo much to write about and so many stories to tell of his faithfulness and committment to me and to all of us. But, that's probably why i have been slacking when it comes to blogging...So much to tell. But this, this is really good. And this is really fresh. It happened just this morning. Join me as i am still processing...

According to my Webster's pocket dictionary (and yes i do have one), the word infinite means: (1)having no limit or extending indefinatley; (2)vast.

With that said, God IS soo infinite. He never stops. He's always been and will always be. He has never come on the scene, because he has always and will always be the scene. He wasn't created by anything nor mastered by anything. He isnt revolutionary either. God is ever expounding.

That is just ridiculous to me. HOW??! How is it that a God like that, the God like that, came and died and LIVES in you and me. Knowing that he is about his glory and its all tied back to his glory, still why?? Why us? Why me? His grace is infinite then. This is all just mind boggling to think about. But that's where his truth comes in.

The story...

I dont know about you, but there are many mornings that i wake up and before i can even realize that i am awake and not asleep...i am already under this wave of faulty condemnation. You know, the kind where you didnt do anything. U just woke up and there it was. This happens to me alot. It can be considered a good thing though...bc immediatley i am forced to seek his face. So praise him for that. But this morning, i woke up and there it was. Faulty condemnation. There wasnt any kind of sin that was lurking in the back of my mind that lead me to this. It was simply a tactic of the enemy.

Insert: The Lord has been on a mission to teach me that our mind is where everything occurs. The enemy uses our minds to plant everything but the truth and good news of jesus, in order to either sabotage our freedom in christ, to get our minds off of jesus, or to get us to stumble...which still accomplishes the first and second.

Continuing right along...
I went and got in the shower and it was still lingering over me. The wave of bullcrap that the enemy was trickling on me. Then Jesus came to set me free again of the bondage that i used to be enslaved to. He spoke this over me...

Christian:

"My compassions and mercies are new EVERY morning! You are mine and i am yours. Today is different because it is new. Because i am the author and perfector."

Wow!! U talk about exillerating. I was floored. And immediatley my face hit the floor. He is soo worthy of all that we are.

That truth led me to search out that particular scripture. I had read it a thousand times and still couldn't remember where it was. Eventually i got there.

Lamentations 3.22-23

[Because of the Lord's great love, we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning.]

We are never consumed by anything but jesus. It is the only thing that consumes. That wave of condemnation...it doesnt consume. Jesus consumes it.

You getting this now?

I kept thinking and analyzing, "NEW EVERY MORNING." That means that every morning and every day is different than the day before and the day before that, etc. If that doesn't get our minds out of the box and create a desire to live joyfully and expectant of jesus in everything, then i dont know what will.

Amazing. The word Infinite. How appropriate. Infinite God. Each day of my life and your life, his compassions are new and exciting and packaged in truth sent by God to his uniquely created worshippers.

Because [we are his and he is ours.]

Thank you for being infinitely bigger than we can imagine.

consumed,
::johnchristian

.:The Hope of Glory:.

2005-11-05T09:01:00.000-08:00

"the mystery that has been kept hidden for ages and generations, but is now disclosed to the saints. To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is: Christ in you, the hope of glory." Colossians 1:26-27

Wow!

That is some penetrating truth.

I am speechless after reading that and trying to make that make sense in my tiny little brain. That such a big, huge, unfathomable God, whom no one knows the mind of, much less instruct him...is in me. And in you.

Paul unlocked the mystery of the gospel a longgg time ago. But i feel like alot of us, in our lack of faith, deny that powerful truth and keep that truth locked up and a mystery. I know that recently, in my journey with jesus, i have not acknowledged that. Acknowledged that jesus, the hope of glory, the original idea of God...lives and resides in me. I don't have to go anywhere to be in the presence of God. He is in me. He is omnipresent. That makes sense now. The reason why i could go on writing about this truth is because it has been made real to me again in the last few days by a pair of Godly men from Venezuela. I'll tell the story....

Thursday

Matt has been talking about spreading the gospel among our campus and this thursday he was to talk about taking the gospel global. And the heart of God is for the nations. IE: "every tribe, nation and tongue will confess that jesus is Lord." So with that said, a very cool story unfolded before my eyes as a man named Reineir (pronounced Ray-neer) , who is a 33 year old pastor from a church in venezuela. Which 2 men on Grace Campus's board helped start a little over 8 months ago. Still with me?

moving along...

Reineir was going to be talking for about 10-15 minutes about what God was up to over in Venezuela. And so, as he was talking (with his hispanic twang trailing every word), he kept saying jesus is in you. It sounded so simplistic, but i couldn't get it. He kept saying all we need, all we have, all we want is in us. Because its in jesus. That is soo comforting to know. And realize, we will struggle throughout the rest of our lives for that truth to be real 24/7. But to be aware that jesus, the hope of glory is in me, changes alot. It takes our eyes off of us and our expectations that we place on ourselves and others goes out the window as well.

After encounter, i went up to him and asked him if i could take him and his wife to breakfast the next morning. You know, thinking i could bless them. Well, little did i know that i was going to be the one who got blessed. Turns out his wife couldnt make it...but the man whom they were staying with, and also a pastor from venezuela and now the pastor of the only hispanic church here in Auburn, came with us.

2 hispanic pastors and a 21 year old college kid, who by the way don't know each other from adam's housecat. (you liked that) Sat down and ate breakfast and talked about what God was doing in the bigger picture of things. You know, the bigger picture than ourselves. But they kept encouraging me by truth and words. They kept speaking into me and telling me that jesus, who is the original idea of God, is manifested in me. It was amazing. Amazing doesn't cut it. It was real. We prayed for each other and that God would make this truth real to his children in all the world. Truth is God blessed each of us that morning with more than breakfast food. Rather, with spiritual food. With Jesus. Amen!

Through that and through the lives of other people, it has been really clear to me that jesus is soo committed to us. He is soo committed to restoring the hearts of men and countries that rival him. That sin. Before the beginning of creation...jesus-the truth, the original idea of God, was always meant to save us from ourselves and from our sin. He knew that our depravity would lead us to him. So that glory would be made known in all the world. That's the heart of God. Jesus is the heart of God. And jesus is in us. Thank you father, for loving us individually and collectively. For being committed to us when we aren't committed to you. Thank you jesus that you are THE hope of glory...and not me or anyone else.

May you hear him and be blessed to know him today. Thank you for tracking with me all the way down this page. God blessses you.

.:johnchristian:.

[[ Surrender ]]

2005-10-31T13:37:00.000-08:00

Surrender.

An interesting word. Read the meaning with the connotation of jesus and this journey we are on with him. See if anything makes sense...

Surrender:

1. To relinquish possession or control of to another because of demand.
2. To give up in favor of another.
3. To give up or give back (something that has been granted)
4. To give up or abandon.
5. To give over or resign to, as to an emotion.

Our journey with jesus started with surrender. We surrendered to our pride and our having it together. Our need for jesus to come in and do a miraculous work came out of surrender. As i began to read through the definition of surrender, i couldn't help but smile. We HAVE to surrender everyday. All day. If we don't, we rival God's glory. In our humaness, we tell him we STILL have it together, and we don't need him. You know this battle don't you? I know i do. The good news says this: That if we surrender to jesus and declare that God is God and we are not, then we will experience jesus. We will experience the union we already have with the holy spirit. (Then of course, we will go and talk about how the holy spirit was there) You know what im talking about. The reason for me writing about surrender is because it has been a re-occurring theme for me and some guys that i live life with. Just to clear the air, if ever i refer to "some guys" in this journal, im referring to the 4 other guys i live with and 2 others. Whom i would do anything for. I love those guys!

Back to surrender...

First of all, i want to go ahead and SURRENDER to spiritual pride and an expectation to discover some ground breaking revelation. I surrender to that. This is just out of the overflow of my heart and what jesus is doing in and thru me.

Its funny to me how i fight surrender so often. I believe it has something to do with the fact that the culture i've grown up in frowns at giving up anything. Much less our pride. The thought of surrendering a good and innocent desire is not popular in this culture of america. You get where im going with that. But still, surrender is what we really want. It's in us to want to surrender to something. I have to believe that every single human being that has ever walked the dirt of this earth, wants to surrender to something so much bigger. Being God-Almighty. The reason why i believe that is because we were all created by Him and for Him. All of us. Then there are those, who in his grace, he chose to know him. But every single person that has ever lived or ever will live were created with this indescribable desire to want to surrender. Pride is what sets the people of God apart from the wicked. Pride is how the enemy (whom we are still dealing with) came about. Do you see???

There have been some situations in my life and in the lives of others around me that has pointed me here. To be honest with you and let you see where im coming from, i will tell of some situations in my life that i have had trouble surrenderring to. Follow me in this next story.

Sunday October 30, 2005
After Church at Aumc

I am at Church with all my friends. I just finished listening to a great message by a guy just one year older than me. The message was to give up. Funny, i know. He might as well have just come on out with it and said: "SURRENDER!" I do the normal thing and take it for what it is and then just kind of leave it in the back of my mind. I begin to walk around talking to people afterwards, because thats what i do. I like to talk to people. I can't help it. As im talking to a few folks, insecurity comes flying at me out of nowhere. Im not kidding, i was under it just 5 minutes after the speaker prayed us out. I was rattled because 4 different people didn't really seem interested in me. Lies mounted on each other and i wasn't believing the best about them...i eventually left and went straight home. I was in desperate need of jesus to come and satisfy me. It was really hard to surrender at this point. Because i've got flesh rising up and trying to stake its claim. The holy spirit was leading me though. I heard him. Whispering and revealing to me this insecurity and need to be satisfied. I must tell you that the moment i spoke aggreance with jesus on this, i felt a peace and joy come over me that is inexplainable. No online journal can truly capture what happened in my apartment yesterday after church. I would love to continue writing about that incident and tell you more cool things that occured...but i can't. I rested in his prescence and let him satisfy me.

I wrote this in my journal and now i would like to share it with you....

"May surrender become even more evident in my life. May love lead me to the place of jesus' heart, where and only where i can be fully satisfied."

"Center my mind on what the voice of my shepherd is saying. May my desire to be loved, accepted, and satisfied by a woman who loves you (which is totally an innocent desire) be surrendered to you. To be so content that my mind is oblivious to anything outside of jesus. Let my thoughts stray to no where accept to your truth."

"Make me fall before you, so that humility goes forth, and i can be in your prescence."

"I give all to you. This will not be the last time I have to do this, because it is certainly not the first."

[[ Praise jesus that out of SURRENDER comes SATISFACTION ]]

Really pay attention to the last prayer. Surrender isn't a one time deal. Its a lifestyle of abandonment. Thank you for reading. Now Go...live a life of surrender and let jesus satisfy you.

surrendered,
johnchristian::

jesus.

2005-10-19T00:30:00.000-07:00

Since this is the first post. its got to start with jesus. I want to know him on such a more intimate level. I want to tap into his heart beat.With that said: i believe that the heart beat of jesus is humility. its what is hardest for us to desire. no one likes pride to be revealed or brought about or crushed. its what we need. just like pride and sinfullness was wired into us as "pre-jesus-sinful-people;" On the other side of the cross and the glorious redemption of his blood... humility is wired in us now. i dont know if that makes much since but i know what im trying to say. before "jesus in us" we didnt possess the capability to be humble in the eyes of God. we were enemies of him. humility and righteousness is what we have and possess now. by the blood of jesus we can access the heart of the creator. this past weekend i went to selma with some friends. this is a cool story...

HUMILITY-from a man named mel. thank you mel!

This man named Mel had grown up and lived in the Selma community his whole life. Everyone knew him. He knew everyone. Mel was "supposedly" a christian. But he was a religious man. There is a story in the Bible that reminds me of this. There were a few people who begged to differ. They prayed and prayed.

Six weeks ago Mel went to an Emaeus walk. While there, the holy spirit was at work in him. Mel started to become aware of some "junk in his heart." As he would tell you. Sin was being convicted in this mans' heart. A dying process had begun. Life was about to spring forth. The redemptive blood of jesus that us "bible-belters" have heard our whole lives was starting to take some gravity.

Mel was overcome with guilt and conviction. Shame was mounting. He prayed that the Lord would help him get this "junk" out of his heart.

The Lord is STILL faithfull.

Mel knew he had to confess this stuff to his committed, loving, and praying wife. Praise God for her. Through this story i know the faithfullness of the Lord has made traction on her heart.

I now have chill bumps as i type.

Moving along...

He was with her on the way back from the Emaeus trip and as they were riding in the car it started. It being the junk. The junk was starting to come out. He said it was the longest one hour of his life. He told her everything. She accepted him. She loved him. She was proud of her man!

Fast Forward

Mel has a daughter. He decides to call up his daughter at college. Imagine this phone call if your a girl. Your dad calls you to tell you that he will be sitting with you at the banqueting table...feasting with the king...and you. Don't you love the way he put that? Wow! Amazing. His daughter was deeply moved. As any daughter would be after a phone call like that.

Six weeks ago Mel was dead.

Now he is on fire for jesus. This fire has been contageous in the community as of late. He was asked to give his testimony in "the baptist church" on sunday. Mel goes to the Presbyterian church. They are right across the street from each other. Kind of funny. On saturday I had the opportunity to meet Mel and chat with him for a moment. He had come out to his land (where we were) to bushog and get the land ready for hunting season. As I was talking with him, I could tell he was real excited about talking in front of the church. He was there to be with jesus. He might have been bushoging...but in reality...he was with jesus. Getting ready.

Well now its Sunday morning and just to give you a brief overview of the spiritual scenery at First Baptist Selma...its got your typical men who put on there faces and do the sunday morning deal...then leave unchanged and unmoved. But thats not really a fair assessment of that Church. Its great. But like all imperfect bodies of Churches, there is going to be some who were just like Mel. Religious men. You get it now.

Soo, the pastor gets finished speaking a little bit and introduces Mel up and hands him the microphone. Mel was jacked!! Joy was all over him. As he started talking, he told them basically what i've been telling you. As I started to look around, I saw men and women. But more men on the edge of the pew. There hearts stirring. knowing THERE IS MORE! More than there businesses or there golf game or there whatever you want to insert. Mel was expressing his passion for jesus and it was contageous. But humility. Ahh...we're back to that word. Humility is what was pouring out of this man. This is what happened...

(He starts to kneel on the carpet. In front of everyone as he is speaking)

Mel says: "This is just something I like to do every day to show the attitude of my heart. [[interjection: Ok, the man is on his knees for 10 straight minutes before a congregation telling them how much he loves jesus and what God has genuinely done in his heart.]] To show God that he is big and I am small. And the funny thing is, I used to worry what you might think of me. But now,I dont care what you think of me because I know im (he gets louder) SAVED AND I LOVE MY SAVIOR!" (thats just awesome)

Is that not incredible? There were hearts that were riveted after hearing that. In all honesty I myself was choking up and stirring as well. To see a man come to the end of himself. To embrace the dying process. And to just go hard after jesus--no matter what the cost. It was refreshing to say the least.

So i went down afterwards and talked to him again. But while i was waiting to chat...i notice some men were waiting to talk with him too. Could it be that they were soo moved by the humility pouring out of Mel that they wanted what he now had? That's exactly it! A man called my Selma friend's dad and told him he is just like mel and wants what he's got. AMEN!!! Praise God that the Lord is more committed to us than we can truly understand.I believe the Lord is doing a remarkable work in the hearts of men in this country. That we would not settle for passivity or complacency. That we would walk in the knowlege and truth of who God calls his men. That we would rise up with passion and love for jesus to lead women and to lead families. All of this out of a heart that cries HUMILITY. Its going to be exciting to watch.

I hope this story and testimony of how great our God is has moved you to a place where you can see him and then respond to him the way you were created to. Thank you. Till next week. Go in the grace and peace that's ours in abundance.

abandoned-
johnchristian